Woke up Half Crying ; Crazy Ride

Date: 10/11/2020

Beginning is hazy, don't know where it started I remember being in my house, in my room like I am now. I'm only in my underwear, relaxing, and the dogs are outside on their chains like usual. I happen to look out of the window to the street and sidewalk below, and spot Animal Control snooping very suspiciously around our house with these nets. When they move in for their target, my dog who'd in real ife recently broke off of his chain to get to a different dog. I pop up quickly and yell for my mom that the Animal Control people were taking Cannon, and she ran outside. I, finding this a time sensitive situation, ran outside not far behind her still in my underwear. I ask them "Where's my dog?!" and the guy responded that he was right there. He was to my left in front of me, sitting in an open kennel. I'd been so pissed I didn't even realize he was there. I let my mom do the rest of the talking, and found out the Animal Control guys were doing a... I don't remember what they called it, but it wasn't voluntary. Cannon was on his chain and we were extremely pissed they would just do this without warning. I went back inside. After this, I was at some sort of party or bar, drinking it up and having fun. I saw some dude drinking a slushie on top of a huge sundae, another slushie, and yet another sundae. I was surprised, excited, and absolutely a bit drunk. I went to goo dance somewhere I think, and a friend told me not to. I think I did anyways, it's another hazy patch of dream. I ended up in someone's car, I feel like it had a red exterior with a tan or grey inside. There's a guy driving, no one in the passenger seat. In the backseat, there's me, and some other white girl I don't know. I didn't look too much at her to remember her features. I don't remember much of what was said or what we were doing. I think we were playing some sort of game. The girl had a gun at some point, her hands were shaky as she lifted it up. It clicked a few awful times before she actually shot herself beside me. I rolled out of the car not long after. And it was a hallucination, possibly caused by my anxiety about what would happen during this ride. Whatever game we were playing though, I'd won. And my prize? A nicely sized bag of cocaine. Like, if I had a sandwich bag, it'd fill up a bit more than a decent corner. This was expensive. This was dangerous. We had pulled up to the side of my house when he reached back and offered it to me. I told him the girl could accept it for me, and he refused. I HAD to take it with me, one final test. I could see my mom's boyfriend and his cousin's boyfriend in the carport talking to each other. I didn't want to make this guy mad, and I certainly didn't want anyone to know I had drugs, or think I was doing them. I, smartly, accepted the bag of coke and stuffed it into one of the bigger pockets of my cargo pants, then walked straight into my house, to my room, and dumped them into the trash without a word. I took off my gloves, which might've been yet another hallucination from me wanting to have had them on while carrying such a potent drug. I washed my hands beyond thoroughly, and I could already feel the drug taking effect on me despite not having taken any. There must've been some on the bag that I hadn't accounted for, maybe I rubbed my eye or licked my finger and it got in that way. I looked at my face in the mirror and my eyes looked red around the edges. I looked away for a sec and looked back, and my eyes were completely white, I was scared, blinking it away until it went back to normal. Another hallucination. I made the wise decision to go to rehab or something as quickly as possible. Sitting in the waiting room made me feel miserable. To my left, there was this boy and two workers in uniforms. In front of them was a table full of a variety of fruits, from apples to grapes and bananas and mangoes, even plantains. The boy had a tube of sorts, and was happily sniffing the scents of those fruits through it. I don't exactly know what they were doing it for, especially around all of these people, but I wanted to do it too. Especially sniffing the bananas, as they're one of my favorite fruits. I patiently waited, and I simultaneous started to feel more and more miserable. I could feel the tears pricking at my eyes. In my sadness, I'd leaned back onto a ball on the armrest and relaxed my head into it. I don't know if I moved away voluntarily or if the woman behind me moved it, but I apologized profusely, losing my mental footing and starting to cry. She felt a bit of sympathy for me, maybe even a little empathy, because she put it back. I kept crying as I laid my head onto it, and woke up crying a little. I didn't have tears everywhere, but they were in my eyes, my chest felt tight and I did that little quick huff that children do when they cry.