Fuck

Date: 4/1/2025

By ModelLaDawn

Lisa is holding a giant thing of white roses. I see her from across the giant room, almost feels as if I’m in a crowded stadium. She’s ominous. I start freaking out. It feels like she’s there for dad. He speaks to me gently as I’m crying. He’s not wearing glasses and it’s like he’s carrying me or I’m floating. He doesn’t want to live this way and it’s time to go. He doesn’t want to leave us but can’t stay. It’s terrifying. I’m devastated. But I understand and his voice assures me it’s ok, Out to dinner with Lesha & Obama. I want people to think he’s my dad. In a shoe store waiting to get my food measured for running. They are taking forever and having some sort of meeting with a lot of different level employees. I’m eating wat too much cheese and salami or something. Becoming impatient. Keep trying to call mom. Eventually she calls me back on FaceTime but she’s distracted with Marissa, Jason and the kids. Banks is in a giant sink. It gives me anxiety even though people are around. Some sort of game is being played and Marissa tells Dex not to say Isis. I keep telling mom to tell her Isis was an Egyptian Goddess. Mom hears me but doesn’t relay the message. I hang up. I’m pissed off she won’t tell her. She’s more concerned with Marissa liking a Christmas gift she’s opening. Mom calls me on FaceTime as she’s skydiving… it ends badly but I quickly realize it’s not her. Wrong city. It’s just a video I saw on the news or something. I’m driving the black Elantra. It’s getting dark. I’m on 32 near dad’s house going towards Eastern (or it feels/looks like I am). I’m getting ready to turn but the car dies. I’m in the intersection (technically in a safe place) but traffic is super heavy. Semis are flying by. One clips my car. Knocks some stuff off. It stops and so does traffic. A black guy gets out. Part of me thinks it might be a meet cute, another part of me is slightly embarrassed by the car I drive and another part of me wonders if mom will finally pay attention to me if she doesn’t hear from me. I don’t know where my phone is. Must’ve gotten jolted in the accident. I wasn’t on it. Other driver ends up being an ass who doesn’t care. There are many other semi truck drivers around like they’re watching a UFC fight and they don’t want me to win. I was not at fault and no one seemed to be concerned about my well being. One white boy was yelling and laughing from “the stands”. I go off on a monologue about how I’d be more concerned and caring if this were the other way around. The driver didn’t say a word to me. Another brother picks up on my stress and offers me a ride home. He has my phone. It’s 2 something in the morning. Mom still unaware or concerned with my whereabouts. This guy has a girlfriend with him. She’s in a pretty blue tight dress. Guess no meet cute for me with him either.