Dog Swap Elementary

Date: 2/26/2021

I'd already finished college but for some reason I was at my old elementary school taking classes. At lunch they were serving some roasted meat and one kid that was behind the counter with the lunch ladies joked that it was human roast. So that was weird but I ate it anyways, and it was served with some romaine lettuce that tasted like a pickle. After lunch I went out the entrance for some reason, and there was a huge black dog that was limping. I immediately knew it was Chancii's dog (like a guide dog or service dog but idk why, she is not disabled). It was really hungry so I dug through my backpack and found 3 protein bars for it to eat. It led me to some shade of a next door house, and the family that lived there was leaving and I reassured them I was just helping the dog then going back to school, which I did soon after. When I got back to the school, I could not figure out where I was supposed to be. I couldn't remember what classroom or what teacher or even what grade I was. I went to the office for help figuring this out, and they asked to see my ID for verification. For some reason I was wearing it on a badge reel like at the hospital. I held it out for them and then realized it was a single card that identified the dog as a trained and certified service animal.... Somehow we had swapped ID. At this point my phone and keys/wallet were missing too. I tried to give them my phone number and birthday, but I kept getting the numbers wrong because someone was saying other numbers every time I tried. Eventually they got my phone number right and tracked my phone to the nearby neighbor's, which solidified my story and made them believe me. The office lady started being nice to me. We walked out of the office into a small courtyard that wasn't there before. There was a large flower bush (just taller than the building) in each corner, and the one in the far corner suddenly started growing across the courtyard toward the larger bush at an incredible pace. I know it was growing there to pollinate and reproduce with the other bush. When it made contact, the flowers of both bushes became more colorful. I went to wait in a foyer lined with chairs. There were lots of other kids and a couple of parents (my age, so fucking weird) waiting too. There was one lesbian couple, with one dressed in like... A cosplay bikini and a butt plug. She was telling the other mom that if only one of them got to talk to the teacher, she herself needed to be the one because even though she had outbursts, she would actually be effective. She was kinda steamrolling the other mom and being mean and I called her out. I told her something along the lines of what you give is reflected back upon you, so she needed to learn to be more mature and kind. The kids ganged up on her with me. Heh heh heh. The kids were initially wary of me because hello I am an adult, but we told that lady to grow up together, and I won them over by knowing pokemon stuff. They accused me of smurfing in an elementary school just to flex on children, and we all laughed really hard at that. I went to retrieve my phone and stuff from the neighbor's yard. They were eating a Thanksgiving style dinner with the window open, and they waved at me and told me where they saw my stuff. They had green grapes growing in their yard and I took a big bunch and was eating them with the kids when I got back to the foyer.