wedding funeral

Date: 5/8/2017

i was at b's wedding or funeral b. rather than one lane to walk down there were four or more. it slowly became clear to me that he was involved with several different families. i saw people cursing him and everyone in attendance was angry as they already knew or was just learning about his problems. it also seemed to be clear that he was using a lot of cocaine. i woke up and fell back asleep again. i was on a small hill in a desert area. the way the sun was shining through the rustiness into the sparse buildings was very beautiful and i kept trying to capture it on camera. men started coming towards me and i got a little bit scared. later i was on a rooftop alone and i realized i was supposed to get married. i knew i didn't want to. there were two girls on the roof top in front of me talking and laughing. i tried to look at them to get involved in their conversation. shane from the l word called up to me to ask if i was ok. i told her not to come up to the roof but the girls called her and told me to listen to her. on the roof i confessed i didn't want to marry the guy and that i didn't even know who he was and we had never slept together. i asked if she would sleep with me but she wouldn't on my wedding night. at the ceremony there was a cardboard sign with a cartoon devil and obscenities presumably written by my husband to be. when i waited at the sign s came up and morphed into k who appeared 9 months pregnant. when we were asked if we do.. she said she can't and started running away. i ran with her and tried to pull her outside but she went to her family. i kept running out into the desert. when i came back i sat on the carpet and cried.