Dream Journal Ultimate
Date: 2/7/2019
By fluffytree
*Warning graphic* In my first dream I ended up needing to have my car fixed cos it has trouble starting up. I had ended up earlier trying to start it for about 15min near a gas station before it finally did so I headed straight to the nearest auto repair shop to see what was wrong. They found multiple issues of which I forget the specifics, but the final price for all the repairs would end up being a thousand dollars. I'm shocked and start getting anxious cos I'm not trying to spend that kinda money and there's no way the cost of parts and labor really equals to that. So I start thinking I'll just take it to someone else for a second opinion and I went to another dream right afterwards. Now in my 2nd dream I had just arrived in Japan some hours before and had made this trip on a sudden whim due to loneliness and monotony. First thing I did was go to some anime convention in the Akibagahara district but I just ended up feeling more lonely due to not knowing anyone. I wanted to call my mom and let her know I'd suddenly gone off to the other side of the world. I'm sure she'd be shocked, but I needed to find some wifi since I'd have to pay insane fees calling internationally using mobile data. So I just kept wandering around admiring the cosplay and watching people play various VR video games at some of the booths. This reminded me alot of my experience at last year's Youmacon convention back in November where I ended up going alone for the most part. Eventually I found my way into some big IMAX theater that was as big as a medium-sized stadium. The seats were layered similarly too but this was a 4D IMAX so you had whole sections of seats that had hydraulics and could move around. My seat wasn't working right and even seemed a bit backwards but I did manage to get my seat belt on which was the most important thing considering I'd heard these seats move around quite alot, enough to easily throw you out your seat. The show hadn't started yet and people were still filing in. I listened in on random conversations in the crowd and remember this older guy coming back to get something of his he'd left or dropped near my seat. We were up on about the 5th level and like a stadium there were stairs that led down to a railing and then below that were the lower levels. So from the railing to the ground level was a good 50ft drop I'd say. That's when I notice a young black woman that was early to mid 20s standing at the railing looking down. She had on a cute pink beret hat, white shirt and jeans as well as wearing glasses. I thought nothing of her until I saw her lean so far over the rail that she was planking and keeping herself balanced with her shins. I wondered how she was doing that but then I thought why is she doing something so dangerous. She then pulled herself back to a standing position and I felt a bit relieved. But then before even a minute passed, I heard her hum a little song before suddenly leaping over the edge with her arms stretched back and head at a downward diagonal as if she were flying downwards. I couldn't believe she'd done that and my heart skipped a beat. I had a clear view of everything unfortunately and watched as she literally splattered headfirst on the hard concrete below making a loud thump sound. Next thing that followed was seeing her body laying lifeless and unmoving while chunks of brain matter and blood pooled around her completely split open skull. I was terrified, disgusted, and so sad. 'Why??? Why did she do this??' is the first thought that crossed my mind and likely so many others minds. She didn't seem depressed or anything like that even though I had no idea who she was. One minute she was alive and humming and at the end of that same minute she was now dead. I may not have understood why she felt suicide was her only remaining option of dealing with whatever had been bothering her, but I did understand why she would want to end her life in front of nearly a thousand people; it was probably so she wouldn't die alone and people would forever remember her. At the same time I began to feel like it was so selfish of her to leave us with such a traumatic memory, but then I felt bad for being mad at someone who clearly had to have struggled with a severe mental illness for likely a long time. I could relate considering I've had social anxiety and Depersonalization disorder issues for years now but I would never do this so so many questions entered my mind as to what her story must've been. Everyone was panicked and leaving including myself. One last look at her body and I knew she was gone and there would be no hope of resuscitation. She made sure of that by diving head first into concrete. I woke up after that still feeling so sorry for this dream character that suddenly took their life. I had another dream upon getting back to sleep and dreamt I was somewhere where my car wouldn't start again and ended up at my old house with my late uncle and grandmother who were back to their old selves. Irl my uncle died back in summer of 2017 and my grandmother (his older sister) had a heart attack this past September which left her permanently brain damaged and in mostly a vegetative state. So it was so nice to see them the way I remember them and I actually believed that my grandmother must've miraculously gotten better. We didn't live here and were helping the new owners fix up certain things. My uncle especially was upstairs repairing old light fixtures and such. I woke up feeling sad that it was just another dream...