Dream Journal Ultimate
Date: 9/12/2018
By livburnie
I'm hoping that someone can make sense of this and help me out because it's becoming a nightmare, literally. my body clock likes to wake up at like 6am recently and up to that point I have pleasant, happy light dreams. but obviously I'm exhausted, so then I try to get at least and hour or two of extra sleep. what happens in my dreams these additional two hours are horrible. mostly they are nightmares, or lucid dreams I suppose. it's like I'm watching a movie but I'm the main character and I can feel everything, every time someone jumps and scares me I feel my whole body shake. but recently, my past has come back to haunt me, but in a different way. my boyfriend and I were together for 5 years before he cheated on me. in my dream, I went up to him in my car, and forced him to come inside and have a conversation with me to talk about everything. and he acted almost exactly as he would if I had the convo IRL - cold, blunt, uncaring. but then it feels like a shift changes and he opens up to me and apologizes and I end up forcing myself to wake up because I dont want to feel those emotions anymore. because I know they arent real and every time I wake up from one of these very realistic dreams (examples like this, my mom dying, getting into a car accident etc) I literally feel the pain I was in. like my heart aches and my foot aches from driving around in the dream all day etc. it's also just very emotionally distressing. it's the worst kind of dream to imagine something that isnt there, but you can feel it, physically and emotionally, almost as real as you could feel anything.