roadtrip cherries and mall gynecology?????

Date: 2/28/2017

By Mephistopheless

I was with my mother, grandmother, nephew and I think my grandma's twin sister Bonnie. (Bonnie and Bobbie, hootinest tootinest old ladies ever ❤) We were going to see my brother in Wisconsin because he's in prison and we make annual trips to see him. So we left to go to the car rental place and for some reason our only choice in vehicle was..a very tiny Aston Martin but SOMEHOW we all managed to squeeze in. We came across a back road and this man was selling cherries. So....I hopped out of the car and had long black hair and a beige sundress with tiny flowers on it? My mom thought it was weird because I'm a boy but FUCK gender roles, I will wear what I please. So I walk a few miles and come across the man sitting in a fenced in area leaning over a bucket probably removing stems from cherries (what fer? dunno) and he looks at me, so I ask him if I can have some cherries. He replied in a very thick accent, "you can have many as you like, too many to make pay." (Which also didn't make sense because all the trees he had he could make major monies, but maybe he isn't into that) So my mom followed me and we both grabbed a bucket and he started tapping the tree branches with his utility knife so the cherries fell in. We got back to the cramped car and I looked inside of my bucket, but instead of cherries they were raspberries. Still good!!! We got to the hotel which also doubles as a mall? I found a room and it was very classy and shiny, and had a bunch of glass knickknacks like fairy's and stuff. Then a blonde woman came in and she looked like Lisa Kudrow from Friends. We sat and talked a while and then I had to go downstairs to the mall part, and even though I'm a cis male there was a gynecologist appointment the mall....what the SHIT.