Date: 5/28/2017
By Fitful
I was recently moved into a new place and it was near a low key strip mall. I decided to go to the Spiritus store there to get my computer fixed. The man at the counter in the back said he could fix it, and had me hook up the thing to his computer system while he went to the front. My computer seemed on the fritz, fuzzy and blinking madness. I waited for him to come back, and ended up waiting 8 hours. The front behind the counter was a hospital, and he was deep in surgery for most of the day, hands dug into a body on a slab, whilst another doctor beside him was the same. Sometimes he had a chainsaw and was hacking limbs. Finally, tired of waiting I asked him when he'd be done, he said he probably wouldn't be able to get to it today, he was still elbows deep in a bloody body's cavety. But most people, he told me, just leave their computer with him overnight. He should fix it with a day or two. I agreed and he asked me to leave my number just in case he didn't have the current one on file. I agreed and found a napkin to write but decided it wouldn't work due to the wet bar beneath. I got a paper and tore it instead. A girl I had a short fling with a few years back, Koi, showed up while I was waiting for my computer to get fixed an do ester me the rest of the dream. At first I didn't recognize her, because her skin was even darker than it was irl, now almost a truely black hue, but her hair was piled high in intricate braids on her head, and her long oval face lent me recognition after a brief "who are you?". She apparently wanted to get back with me, she said she didn't understand why I stopped talking to her. We sat on our knees in the front area of the store, like children playing and I remembered I had just stopped talking to her. After a few days of going back to the the Spiritus store, which turned out to the the entire length of the strip mall instead of just a single store in it, she became a bother. She caught me every time I came around and begged me to be with her again. She said she knew I was going to the Spiritus store and made sure to catch me when I went. She said she really wanted to try again, I could tell part of it was a sexual thing. The sex between us had been nice. I was a bit angry and resolute, I didn't want to be with her. She had treated me in a certain way I didn't enjoy. ~~ I was recently moved again, to a new apartment, I had a few roommates who seemed cool but I later got to know just were my kind of people. But eager to fit in I went with them to a local club each night. It became a routine and I started recognizing my life less and less. I kept having to go to the grocery store, but put it off to go clubbing. I hated clubbing and drunking. I didn't really fit with them, but kept going. It was an all girl club, and it was nice to be among lesbians and people who did want to interact, even if they didn't like me in the end. But i became more and more uncomfortable with the club scene. I notice different wasn't eating right, I had randomly a started eating meat served at the club and i recognized it wasn't me, I really needed to go to Trader Joes. I began to make a list so I could go shopping and eat properly. I remembered that I would have to go to a Trader Joes with a grocery store in it, apparently it was a clothing store unless you went to the expanded one, and I looked up on my phone where it was. But I got distracted by routine again and I was dancing in the club by myself trying to have a bit of time away from my roommates. They were driving me crazy and I really wanted to move, except the apartment was so beautiful. The club owner stood near me ordering her blond girlfriend around who was actually being quite attentive and serving customers adroitly. The owner made a few cruel remarks and I turned away uncomfortable again when she paused and made derogatory innuendo it seemed directed at me. I turned and she was staring at me. I returned an arched innuendo back and left the dance floor for the back room, which was very much like a spring room, all glass windows overlooking a pretty garden, shining with sunlight. It had a lot of growing things. She followed me and said I was rude, for making that comment at her in front of her girlfriend and interrupting their fight. I had assumed she actually had been talking to me, which I admitted to, choosing honesty. She said it was very vain of me, and I agreed for a moment my shoulders hunched in self consciousness, but then I straightened my spine and told her maybe she should be more careful where she puts her attention when she makes those comments. The party, which had been a dark clubbing atmosphere, became a garden party full of people in pastels and tans and dainty china plates and the sun streaming in large glass windows. I had my cat with me and a woman asked me to watch her baby, which I found much more tolerable than interacting with the adults. The baby had a cat too, so I had to juggle the three of them and watch them but it was fun. I was going to take the baby outside so the green laws could tickled our feet but I didn't want the cats to run off so I went deeper into the house to find a room for us all to play in. The house, once you went deeper into it, was endless. It was full of lots of wood paneled rooms and was reminiscing of old Victorian house's attics, only well kept and fit for living in as rooms themselves. I kept falling in love with each room and the only problem was they were open and the cats and the baby could get out of eye contact and into trouble. After going from room to room I found a hallway fill of beautiful clothes, the clothes were her inventory, apparently the club was also a clothing store. There was a knocking on one of the walls and I asked the cat if it had knocked, but of course it didn't answer. The baby crawled under a rack of nice clothes after I looked at this lovely little black jacket and out it back, I got down on my hands and knees after her. I found her strumming a guitar with her toes, giggling. The cats had gone in after her. I coaxed her out with a cookie and she didn't crawl out but balanced on the guitar strings, which were suddenly hung up, as if they were monkey bars. She was barley one year old so I was impressed and then she split into three little girls. They each came out, a little aged apart, none of them over 4, and they were blonde and darling, and I realized they were mine. I was so happy, they were so beautiful I didn't care they were going to declare for the Light, while I was Dark. I hugged them as the sun shone into the room warming the wood both figuratively and literally. It was like one of those childhood moments, when the world pauses and that breath where little girls live is just magick. I was so happy I was going to get to see them grow up.