Freakout in Turkey

Date: 7/21/2016

I was hanging out with some friends having a drink at someone's house party. Then the guys decided to move the party along. 😂 we go down the corridor and walk through some beads. Suddenly, I'm in a middle eastern bazaar! After some wandering around taking it all in and experiencing the local colour, a screeching, mechanical noise is heard in the distance. Everyone looks up in unison. In the distance we see a huge swarm of birds. It takes me a moment to realise what's going on. A local man grabs my arm and we run under a canopy. I'm terrified and can't find my friends anywhere. The birds are vicious and swarm down just missing my head. Everyone is screaming. The army roll up and several soldiers line up with guns at the ready. The commander counts down from 4 but it's in an language I cannot understand. At 0, the squad simultaneously fire shots at the swarm. The birds are immediately paralysed and fall to the ground. I'm relived only for a few seconds before I notice a group of large wild cats with Cobras for tails surround me. They're ready to pounce. The man who grabbed explains in broken English that I should stay still and once the gates behind be burst open, the cats will run. My heart is pounding and I'm certain I'm going to die. Just as the gates open, the cobra cat jumps at me but I dodge it. Almost instantly everything returns to normal. People go back to their business as if nothing happened. I notice in the middle of the bazaar, there a small film crew and Gene Wilder. Confused as fuck, I start talking with them and I learn I'm in turkey in 1980.