Dream Journal Ultimate
Date: 6/14/2017
By fluffytree
I'm in some unfamiliar home as a POC (Point of Consciousness) without a body simply watching a scene play out as I follow recent events of my old middle school and hs classmate Natasha. I've always been sorta jealous of her ever since I saw her in person way back in 2005 where she'd just graduated college and told me she'd bought a house, got a job as a TV news reporter in Atlanta Georgia, etc. Life had really been going so well for her where it was the opposite for me. I mean it wasn't bad and I was still working my way through college too while living at home, but I just couldn't stand how far she'd gotten compared to me. I remember thinking how I hope I never saw her again in my life and I never did either. Don't really feel that way anymore these days even though we're friends on Facebook now and she still seems to be pretty successful in her life and career, but anyway, real life backstory aside, I dreamt she was still a reporter working in a small town but had recently disappeared. She'd fallen on hard times for some reason and took to prescription pills and booze. Her perfect marriage had ended up in divorce too and things were just falling apart for her. No one knew where she vanished off to but she still kept in contact with her little brother via hand written letters she would send from time to time. I'm basically just a ghost looking over his shoulder while he reads her latest one. What she describes is very ominous. She says she ran across a story so big it completely changed her life and perspective on things and now she can't trust her superiors because they're in on it too. She doesn't go into detail as to what this is all about and says she has to keep it to herself for now because they're trying to kill her so she won't talk. She figures if she tells anyone else right now their lives will be in danger too. I get a glimpse of her mom who's suddenly there reading with him too and she mentions how she hopes she's taking her medication for her delusions and all cos this whole letter is likely just her having another episode. I didn't know she was dealing with a mental illness too wow. It makes me not trust what I'm reading either. We get to the end of the letter where she addresses the both of them saying she's sorry and that she "has to do this because it's too much." she finishes the last of it saying, "You'll understand soon enough what they did," before signing off. I get a past glimpse now of her writing the letter and I can see her face even though the room is very dimly lit. She's been crying and it looks like she's holed herself up in some remote cabin somewhere. I feel so sorry for her now. Forget all the jealousy I had before cos this is pretty heavy whats going on with her. I just can't help but think, 'Tasha... What happened to you? What did you see?' It must've been something terrible to make her this way cos she's always been the opposite; very vibrant, social and usually with a smile on her face. The last shot of her I see is her hands grabbing a rope that's already been tied in a loop. She was wearing pink nail polish. I don't wanna believe what's ultimately befallen her, but it's pretty clear now that I've seen all this. I shake my head in despair as I drift off to the next dream. Now I'm simply at work for my usual midnight shift only there's some workers up on 3 or 7 still working late. Typically when I come in no one's there and that's how I like it so I admit I do get a little annoyed knowing there's people still around. Eventually one guy comes down to leave at around 2am and he doesn't look familiar so I assume he's a new employee. He looks young like he's just graduated college. Good on him for getting a job so soon after finishing school. Wish that happened for me but here I am still working security instead of doing something productive career-wise with my fine arts degree. He comes to the window that looks into the security office and asks if he'd be okay getting out of the building since he parked in the parking garage. I say he's fine and there's always a way out, it's just getting back in after hours requires you to come only to the back entrance where I can let him in. He nods and goes on his way. He turns around and comes back to ask another question though, this time he wants to know where the garage is. Ugh, seriously? I'm getting annoyed by this guy now but I tell him where it is. A little later I go to the bathroom, which is not in its usual place directly across from the office and further down the hall like how it is at this building's twin tower, and immediately find that same guy in there from before. I can't believe he's still here. I saw him a half hour ago it seemed. Maybe he forgot something and had to do some extra work. Man BNP (Company on the 7th flr) really works their employees hard especially the new ones. I take it he's been here for 12 straight hours which means legally they can't have him come back til at least 2pm tomorrow. There's a window that looks out onto the front lot where I see this guy's car. Don't know how I knew what he drove, just did. I go to pee and he nods in acknowledgment to me. I nod back. We finish about the same time and I go to wash my hands when my coworker Stephanie comes in. I don't question for a second why she's in the men's bathroom cos I'm always glad to see her. She says something to the other guy for a second and then gleams her usual bright smile at me and asks me how I am while gliding her hand across my back. She just oozes cuteness especially with the fact that she wears braces too. I definitely have a crush on her irl but am way too shy to do anything about it unfortunately. Sometimes I feel like it might just be my imagination and she's just really nice, but I feel like she's flirting with me sometimes. Also the way she smiles at me seems like it means more than what it is cos she seems to have this wanting look in her eyes. Again it could just be me reading too much into it though. I start feeling anxious like I usually do around her and other attractive women and end up waking myself up in the process.