Saving my Sister from a Croc

Date: 10/19/2019

I was at some kind of performance. I was a cosplay of some kind, from a movie. I was a small Asian girl with a cute baby monkey and singing some song. Once my part was finished I went and sat next to an older chubby white couple who was trying to touch the monkey. He got squirmy and ran away. We were in a large gymnasium and he went straight for the door. I ran after him and when I got outside he was standing next to a few people including my sister. I told people to grab him. When he saw me he let out a loud angry yell as if I had done something wrong to him. I felt the people around me assuming that I abused him in training, but he was just a baby. Maybe he was forcefully taken from his mother, I’m not sure. It’s key to point out that just outside this gym is a lush Amazon rainforest with a river instead of a road. My sister was swimming in the river where there was a small bank a few feet out. I told her to try and get the monkey but she couldn’t and he ran away. I was also trying to tell her to be very careful because a giant croc was in the water about a foot in front of her. When I say giant I mean GIANT. So huge that she thought it was rocks and went to step on it to come back over the river. When she did it swung around toward her with lightning speed. I yelled for her to hurry and swim to me. She dove off its back as it thrashed it’s body. As she swam to me, I’m kneeling on the banks with my arms stretched out ready to grab her hands and pull her out. She lunged out of the water and grabbed my hands thinking she was home free, but the croc came up right behind her, chomping down on both her legs. My one hand slipped from her grip and the overwhelming strength of the croc ripped her from my hands and back into the water. I see in his eyes that he’s calculating the best way to eat her, or if he should swim away from the bank where many people watch in terror. In a split second I decide to jump in after her. She’s under the water, legs still in the crocs mouth but with her arms still stretched out. I grab her arm with one hand, and with the other I stick my fingers as far into the crock snout as can and as violently as I can. He rears back and open his mouth for only a moment, but long enough for me to pull her from his jaws and try to rush to the shore as he shakes his head and tries to get his bearings again. As I’m swimming to shore, I yell for help from others to come drag us out of the water. The closest person is a women, tall and slender, slouched over holding a cigarette who gives us a glance as if she’s bored, unamused and couldn’t be bothered. I screamed for her help, begging her as I can see the croc is nearly ready to attack again. With a sigh and a roll of her eyes, she reaches her arm out and helps lift us both out of the water. The other people on the river’s bank disperse. They were all faceless and voiceless and served no real purpose than to be at the show at the gym and watch this chaos unfold. I picked my sister up, she tells me her legs are broken and I know we need to take her to a hospital. She’s strong though, she isn’t crying, I think she’s possibly in shock. She’s wearing jeans for some reason (even though she was just swimming) so I can’t see any blood or how mangled her legs may be. She’s just holding me with her arms around my neck as I carry her into the gym. I’m also no longer a small Asian girl, I am myself. As I carry her she is thanking me for saving her. She is in awe that she’s alive and happy to be. I’m so thankful she is too, thinking of how deeply pained I would be if it went differently. As I carry her, limp legs folded over my arms, we walk towards the front of the gym where my parents are to find them so we can go to the hospital. When we get up to the front, there is a sort of lobby where you go to buy tickets and snacks before going into the gym. My mother is there, and with an exasperated gasp says “ugh there you two are, we’ve been wanting to leave”. I don’t really know how to react to this as I’m holding my sister in my arms and my mother doesn’t even acknowledge it. I say to her “mom, she was attacked by a crocodile and both of her legs are broken, we need to get her to a hospital right now!”. She looks at my sister and me and says while rolling her eyes impatiently “ugh, why am I not surprised?”. I couldn’t believe it. Did she hear what I said? Did she understand that her daughter was almost just croc food? That BOTH her legs are mangled and she needs serious medical attention? I tried to think if something like this had happened before? Was my sister generally reckless enough that this was a minor inconvenience? How could that be? She’s only 13 years old and she’s still in good shape except for right now. It felt so insensitive and I couldn’t understand it. THATS IT! Then I woke up. My theory on the last part about my mom is that she dismisses people’s traumas. She isn’t strong enough to help people with their pain so she just tries to pretend it doesn’t exist or isn’t as bad as it is, even if you’re in her face telling her it’s bad. She would rather just assume you’re being dramatic or seeing attention or being irresponsible than admit that you may be in serious pain. This is rooted in my childhood and my sister’s as well. She is 13 currently and I see how she’s treated and the trauma she’s been through but no one (except me) acknowledges that it’s real. It definitely has an effect on me and my mom can be so passively cruel and dismissing in ways that most people never see. I saw them both yesterday which is probably why I dreamed that. My theory on the monkey situation is that I have guilt about how I treat people. That somewhere in my life I feel like I’ve done something wrong in my relationships and the innocence of those interactions has turned against me, but I don’t know exactly what I did or who it may be about. If I had a child I would relate it to that, or a pet that maybe I’ve neglected lately, but I don’t so I’m not sure.