Back to 2005

Date: 8/22/2020

All of a sudden I am in my body, in a Walmart, with my first husband... and I panic. What the hell, I look at him and he looks young. I look down at me and see that my body is in shape! Holy shit!!!! It can’t be possible. I see someone I recognize and run to her telling him I see an old friend. I rush up to her and she is alarmed, shopping with her two small kids. Brandi!! Look I know this is going to sound completely insane but you have got to believe me. I just traveled back in time. She pushes me away no doubt to protect her kids. I tell her their names, her last name, moms name, cousins, etc. I tell her I know her and her story in the future is great!!! I said after your divorce your life skyrockets. She is like divorce!?! What??? Shit, it hasn’t happened yet. What year is it, I asked? 2005 she says. Crap! Yes I am sorry you do divorce, he cheats and is a bastard but it is good for you cause you wanted out for a long time. She was like wow!!!! I said I gotta get outta here... is Uber here yet? She said what? I was like nevermind... wait is it early 2005 or late 2005?! She said early! (I got married in July 2005! I still had a chance to end it and move out, break up the engagement and save 8 yrs of torture from an abusive man!) I ask her to drive me to my apartment, so I could get my car and some things before Eddie realized I wasn’t in the store any longer. She agrees. While in the car i loose my breath! I realize who i can call... i call my mom. She answers!!! Momma! Hey what y’all doing today, she asked? I tell her that i want to come see her and she says okay. I tell her i love her! We make it to my old apartment. I tell Brandi to invest in amazon. I get to my car. My old apartment.. I had a cat. I grab some clothes, personal items, and my cat. I go to my sisters house and tell her I have to leave my cat there for a bit, that I left Eddie and I have to find a place to live. I jump back into my car and head off. I don’t make much money at the time but I tell myself I have to scrape up $200 and invest in Amazon and was racking my brain on what other companies I should invest in. I couldn’t tell my sister about the time traveling cause she was always such a skeptic and wouldn’t believe me... and it’s harder to tell family... i can’t use the excuse of i know everything about you lol she would say yea you’re my sister! Shit... but my brothers would believe! I know they would! Either way I have to make sure everyone invests in Amazon! My 2020 husband, my second husband is the most wonderful person I have ever met! I met him through a mutual friend that wouldn’t move to Louisiana till 2011 and he moves later in 2013... soo much time away. But I tell myself that i had to make sure I marry him! That I end up back with him. In late 2005 I start college, getting an associates in business then changing to graphic design and getting an second associates... which is literally useless in 2020.., I tell myself I will get a bachelors in business and use my investments today to pay off student loans.. APPLE! that’s another one I will invest in! Shit! What’s my work schedule?! Fuck I can’t loose my job it leads to a big career.. but how do I find out if I have any events I have to work... I’ll have to claim I was sick, if so. And i will show up Monday at 7am to make sure I am there earlyyyyyy. Today is Saturday, I have the weekend to figure shit out. All these thoughts are pouring to me as I am making my drive to my moms house... my very much alive mother! How do I tell her she dies of lymphoma in 2014... how do I convince her to get tested every 6 months starting now to catch it early.. how do I tell her anything that she will believe?! FUCK! In 2005 she doesn’t trust me much cause I was a wild hellion teenager only after she saw myself turning my life around in college did she trust I actually made the change... but that hadn’t happened yet. Shit speaking of hellion teenager... I stop on the way, and arrive at my cousins house and tell her how sorry I am for the ways in which I betrayed her. She yells at me. I tell her it was because of the drugs, fogging my judgment but that I won’t make those mistakes again. That she can hate me but that time will heal and I will be there and we will become best of friends because I will always be there. And once we are older the crap from high school is so much less important. It’s true she and I do become more than best friends but I felt it was important that I apologize ASAP so that the wounds could heal faster. I am now back on the road getting closer to my moms... how do I tell her? What do I tell her? I get there and rush to her, hugging her and weeping in her arms!! What happened?! She exclaimed? Did you and Eddie breakup? No this has nothing to do with him!! I love you! I love you so much! And I miss you and just want to be in your arms! I wake up.