Farm Dads

Date: 1/27/2020

I'm a little thrown off by this dream, since my brain doesn't often involve real people in the stories it tells while I sleep. For some reason I can't understand, this dream featured Colin Mochrie. Like, the version of him from earlier Who's Line is it Anyway seasons. He was a major character in this dream. He and a very buff, tall guy with very fluffy hair (like, curly Viking hair) were looking for a place to stay. They were homeless, and wandering from town to town in search of a warm bed and some food. One rainy day, they ended up at a farming town and climbed up into the loft in someone's barn. They made a bed of straw there, with straw pillows and everything, and spent the night out of the rain. The next day, Colin and Viking (that's what I'll call him for now) somehow found an abandoned baby. Nobody in town knew whose baby it was or where it came from, so they just... started looking after the kid themselves. Viking was a little clumsy about parenting, and Colin was consistently exasperated and/or stressed, but they did alright. The baby seemed pretty happy. Since they were doing such a kind thing by taking in this random kid, the rest of the town warmed up to them. They offered a barn that wasn't in use, where the dads and their kid could live rent-free. They donated an actual bed for the dads (no pillows, though, which annoyed Colin briefly until Viking suggested they just keep using straw for that part) and a few of the farmers even gave them laying hens so they'd always have a supply of fresh eggs. They became not only dads at that point, but chicken farmers just like many others in the farming town. At one point, Colin went into the barn and found a Red Bourbon Heritage breed male turkey a lot like the one I have irl at my own ranch. He was a bit more protective of the chickens than my Red Bourbon, but Colin was okay with this. He needed a guard for when he was busy with parenting stuff, anyway. He proudly told Viking that the turkey had chosen their flock, and then went about collecting eggs like normal. A few hours later, a CEO of some company came to spend a day at the farms. When he visited the dads, he explained life hacks he'd used to care for his own children when they were babies. All of them were terrible, and Colin was appalled that anyone would treat an infant so carelessly. He banned the CEO from even touching his and Viking's kid. Instead, he let some neighbors look after said kid while the dads were doing farm chores. They asked for a shift change by writing "he needs the fatter man" in mustard on a plate of snacks intended for Viking. The CEO asked who "the fatter man" was and Collin gave the kind of sigh that says "this is a long and annoying story I'd rather forget." In the end, he rambles about how it's best to just go with it -- someone tried to call Viking "the father man" once and messed up, so now he's "the fatter man" forever, but he's not even fat he's muscular and Colin is a father too so it makes no sense that they only call Viking the father man. CEO regrets asking any questions, and goes back to explaining his life hacks instead. The dream ended with CEO trying to life hack the baby's diaper situation while Viking held his kid high out of reach and Colin scolded them for being childish from up in the loft where he was wearing a frilly blue apron and giving oatmeal to the chickens. It was. Not my usual kind of dream. Until next I wander.