Dimond exchange

Date: 3/25/2019

At val lunch w alex charmers, across the table he is trying to convince me to buy him smokes because he apparently doesn't have idea. Walk around valley to city to spring hill. Supposedly going to night hotel version of night owl. Streets look familiar mixed w some locations I've imagined and created in past (Erin/grace underage smoke). Get the idea that we aren't getting smokes bc w r three suburbs away. Maybe he is lovely, maybe he wants to talk maybe he wants company. Walk past trendy festival gooers. Talk scour scraps dj, jungle giants and nice biscuit. In mac Arthur central, walking to escalator. Group of men in high viz vests which I zoom in on which say Dimond exchange. They are European and I for some reason just notice them. I go to walk past looking him inn the eye. The are all grey haired almost old but strong and european youth. He asks for money. I look at him in the eye full of knowing and hatred which isn't hidden enough. I regret it instantly but am strong and proud. He smiles sweetly and fake gently. I almost chuckle at his transparency. I go to walk past. He puts his hand on my chest and the perfect moment which takes my breath, shocks me and stops me. His eye are hard and serious although his smile is sickly sweet. I become scared. Knowing my outside cracks in its confidence revealing fear - on many unexplained levels. I wake up in this gasp and fear. Weird.