Dream Journal Ultimate
Date: 1/24/2019
By Fitful
I was invited to a movie viewing party with this fat girl who was overly nice, in the way one is when they don't have friends. I agreed to go because I had to pay ten dollars for some insurance thing at the same place the party was taking place. It was like a Walmart but it had a million stories above the first floor and my insurance company was there. It was like a job and insurance company all at the same time. So I went to the party. I sat in a booth and watched the movie. The girl sat witb me and gave me rich sweets I didn't know what to do with and burgers. I hadn't had burgers in years as Iw as vegan. I told her about eating healthy and vegan burgers and not eating so much candy and sweets. The sugar overload was really too much, it wasn't even tasty. She left half way through but insisted I eat. She watched me on a camera as I did what she said. I think she must have been someone important which is why I listened to her when I didn't really care to. Like the bosses daughter or something. Anyway I watch the move and ate. And I tried to talk myself into going and paying that bill. I didn't want to because I didn't think I had that money budgeted. It was only ten dollars for a year insurance of something specific. It wasn't really that expensive. But I was just against spending money. The movie was strange the second time around. This time I got a friend, a gay guy who joined me. But the movie was the inverse of reality, like the entire screen was a mirror reflecting back the little eating area I was in. This time I didn't eat as much, I was very much over sweets. And this time I left before the party was over. I went up stairs, via the elevator and went and paield that bill. It was surprising to me to realize I had plenty of money with which to pay it. It was very easy to visit this all white room, speak to a lady on the intercom, use my account to pay the ten dollars from my $275 dollars I had forgotten I had. Then the pressure of the bill was over and I could relax. I think I went and stayed in the store longer now. The party might have been still going, empty of people, I wandered back there for a while, but I was bored and didn't like candy anymore. I wandered the store, it was like Wal-Mart was a mall or a Macys, all gliz and glammor and plenty of floors but wide open spaces. I dropped my phone on the floor, without a case, and it's screen smashed and the phone died with a red screen signalling the end of it. I was upset, but the upset felt far removed. I didn't want to be on the internet anyway, I was too depressed. I never wanted to do anything again, so I wasn't as upset as I could be. Outiside the store there was a barrel of puppies in water. Someone had left them for give away. I wanted to take them all home and give them loving care. I picked on up, it wasn't wet, but it wasn't a puppy. I was wrong. They were all foxes. I couldn't keep a fox, it wasn't able to be vegan. I was disappointed. I think I was with someone here, a father figure, a man who towered over me who I begged to take one home to. But I'm not sure. It could have been just dream perspective, maybe I was two people at the same time. ~ Later I wake up in a truck. We are miles away in the middle of nowhere. I apologize for snoring, and the man laughs and says I didn't and it's okay. Then I apologize for talking in my sleep. He again says it's no problem. I realize my father? left me here, the man says he's got things to deliver then he'll be at the same place as my parent is. I'm confused but in a sleepy way and as no one told me. But I am content to wait since I have no choice. We do drive by somewhere which upsets me. He stops and delivers something in a residential area and I'm dozing, my head in an awkward position against the window looking up. Through the inverted position I see through the window of an old Victorian house we stopped beside. Mary Watkins is in the window, just a glimpse of her hair and shoulder and maybe half her face but I know it's her. I tear up and feel so sad, I want to see her, but she didn't want me. I feel more like a little girl now, empty.