Nightmare Again

Date: 7/12/2023

So the nightmare started out as a simple dream. I was traveling somewhere with Hubs. I don’t remember where we were going. We were going somewhere… and we were visiting… I think we were visiting a friend or something in another state… but we were going for a walk around their neighborhood. Just you know taking a simple little stroll cuz we were considering moving out around them or something… I don’t know exactly… that part’s kind of jumbled… All I know is suddenly this fucking vehicle pulls up… these people get out and we’re knocked to the ground… like we don’t even have time to react at all… we’re just knocked to the fucking ground. Like I’m trying to fucking stay conscious long enough to be able to fight and I can’t because they hit me so hard. And next thing I know I’m waking up in this room that looks all too familiar… because it’s fucking my ex girlfriend's room from when she lived with her mom… when we were in high school… except now the place is hers… and it’s the room that she and I shared whenever I would stay over… and I just… I’m bound… like my wrists are bound. My ankles are bound. I can’t really move… like at all. I can’t fucking move. I’m fucking bound. I can’t really make out that much outside the fact there’s just this knowing that this is the same room… and then I see the light come on… cuz I have hyper photosensitivity… so I can see really fairly well in the dark once my eyes adjust… so that’s how I could see the room well enough… but then the light comes on and there’s fucking my ex-GF…  Now for context… in the actual real world… my ex-GF is married… she's also big boned and definitely what LGBT spaces would mark as a butch... but for also context… my ex-GF is a possessive bitch… and she kidnapped me, bound me, and also kidnapped my Hubs, and tied him up somewhere else. That I have no clue where… and one thing I remember my ex-GF saying a lot over the time that I knew her was that her family was like a mafia. That they knew people to be able make people disappear if they wanted… and that always stuck with me because of just how terrifying I learned she could be if she wanted to because of the trauma and shit she put me through…  But… ex-GF basically tells me… that if I want my ex-GF returned to wherever our friend was at… safely… that I needed to abide by some rules. My mouth was also gagged so I couldn’t really like say anything… and she more or less told me that I was going to stay in her home as her toy for a while… and if I do as I’m told well enough… she’ll release him. And to make it perfectly clear that none of this was… a falsehood… she showed me a video that was on her phone… it was like a video call thing with someone and it was… showing my Hubs tied up in another location… kind of bruised… barely conscious… and I couldn’t see who the person with him was because it was only showing so much… like it was kind of zoomed in on my Hubs… so I couldn’t really see the person behind him…  So I had to… pretty much agree to be her toy… which went from things like sexual favors to being a punching bag to pretty much whatever she wanted at the time… in order for her to free him… and I didn’t really get a say in anything… so of course I had to basically just oblige… while I try and configure a way to get to him… And the thing that scares me the most… is that if she wanted to… she would do something like that…