death again

Date: 11/21/2016

My boyfriend leaves for work sometimes and in my dream he was gone and I remeber not wanting to be alone so I went to my moms. I go there and I talk to her for bit I remeber going into my old room and laying down for a moment. My sister and brother come home and I remeber thinking I need to leave because I couldn't leave the dogs alone. I wanted to sneak out so my mom didn't ask why I was leaving but she was cleaning by the door so I decide to lay back down and I fell asleep. I had sleep paralysis witching my dream. II remember wanting to get up and I couldn't all I could finesse open my eyes and my head was stuck and I tried so hard but I could not move. I did see an ugly face of some ugly man and it seemed to be lit up by flames that only reflected on his face. Eventually in my dream I broke from it and I remeber telling my sister about it. I packed a suitcase and didn't leave. I left in the morning with a strange woman that I did not trust. Then we were in a McDonald's. I was there with an old coworker and our kids . The McDonald's was packed and then this man comes in with a gun. He is looking at me and my friend. We selfishly ran and didn't think about the kids. This man kept calling me or him a different name and he kept asking why and he kept chasing us we ran outside back inside back outside and I ran into the a street full of cars he pointed his gun at me. Then he pointed his gun at my grind and he went down on his knees. He dropped the gun. And the baby picked it up he grabbed the the gun and he shot again and I blacked out crying. I wake up in my dream with my boyfriend. It felt like a normal day like nothing happened we were home and everything was great. Then he says I have to go get gas. I said why so self the shell is right down the street? He said to me no it is not and said we lived in this new place and that it took a certain amount of time to get to a certain place. I said what??? I asked for my friend and he said do you still not remeber what happened ? I said no what happened and he tells me he died and I began to cry and I said when ? He said several months ago and he told me that I had been like this for a long time thinking we still lived in our old home and pretending I had the life I had before. He said the doctor said I would be like that for a while from trauma that inexpierinced. I started resizing all of this and rem weed my son I said where is he ? And he says with a weird look on his face that I wanted to cry again , that we could take to the beach to watch the water. I remeber thibking I was so happy he was alive. Then I woke up a little scared a little sad.