Algae diplomat

Date: 1/23/2022

I’m at a conference for indigenous communities. I meet an intelligent pile of algae from a pond, who managed to have his community officially recognized. I am embarrassed that I never knew that algae was as intelligent as humans. It is very polite, and explains that it’s here to negotiate with the department of the environment because conservation policies are hurting the algae. The algae explains that they sit in a circle all day underwater and look at each other. They are at war with black algae. I ask if it can see, since it has no eyes, but it says it can see a little. I guide it around the conference, but keep getting left and right mixed up. To be clear: the algae is an amorphous blob, but it is wearing pants.