S.A.S, dog poo & a night out.

Date: 6/16/2017

I was at a anti-terrorist convention in a hotel, with my mum and dad? (I have no idea why, they just was. Lol.) A group of SAS guys were demonstrating this gadget on a live bomb. It was a green ball with different shades of green. They thru the ball at the bomb and all this thick green slime cover the bomb. "If the bomb explodes while we cut the wrong wire then it won't matter because this top secret green slime will protect everyone" this sergeant said. My mum went off on one about she liked men in an army uniform. "Remember when we were in Germany, darling?" My mum said to my dad. "O no." I thought to myself, knowing this was going to turn into some sort of sexual talk they did in the past. My dad just stood there thinking then said to the sergeant, "what if the bomb was on the 3rd floor? How would that protect the people below?". All the SAS guys looked at each other then the sergeant reply "ah! We didn't think about that." They all packed their things and got into a fisherprice toy car and drove off. Next scene: me, scott and Tanis were walking the dogs in the fields. "God, I hate being the 3rd wheel" I said to myself. We climb over a fence to get into the next field. I lost my trousers and shoes, I was there bare footed with boxers on. Scott looked at me and said "you're going to need shoes for this part bro". I scan the fields to find dog poo land. The field was scatter with dog poo, it was like a mine field and there was a bit of a trek to get on the other side. There were all sorts of dog poo shapes and sizes, one dog looked like he try to sign his name. Impressive, I thought. I started to tiptoe my way carefully avoid the dog poo. I mange to get a quarter of the way and I started to lose my balance, quickly scott grab me and said "you want me to give you a piggyback". I agreed to his offer and we made across dog poo land. Next scene: I'm back in the hotel, where I was with my mum and dad but they weren't there anymore. I thought I'll go to my room and play a computer game. I sat down in this small room, I was immersed in the game straight away. There was this cut scene, where this evil person was trying to re-configure this robot to kill people but the heroes turned up to stop him. The animation of their mouths and facial expressions were off and really started to dislike this game. Out of the blue, some old friends from school turned up and sat on the sofa, to the left of me. "Hey, long time no see! Just thought we'll come by. Don't know where everyone else tho" Dan said. "Well they're always late!" I reply. Then Paris (a uni friend) turned up with her friends who I've never met before, sat down to the right of me. One of her friends was crying. "O her boyfriend split up with her and she's been like this for days" Paris explained. Overwhelming I said " O well that's life for you. Why don't you get drunk and have a one night stand with one of these lot. You'll probably feel shit in the morning but who cares! Your ex obviously doesn't care and he's probably on his 6th shag by now". Then I handed her a bottle of wine. Everyone in the room froze and looked at me with shock and disgust. No one didn't say a word. "How's the family, Dan?" I said, to break the ice. Then scott turned up with a couple of other people. "Right let's get out of this room and go out!" Scott said. I really didn't want to because I knew it would just be another rubbish night out but I got dress and tag along. We went to a nightclub that was playing 80's music. Everyone was drinking, the crying girl was on her 4th bottle of wine and sat in a corner with another girl, who was also crying. The music was so good! I headed over the dance floor by myself. The dance floor was empty apart from this very beautiful woman, dancing in the opposite corner from me, all by herself. She looked so elegant and her moves were hypnotising. "I can't. I'm way out of her league, I'm not good enough" I thought to myself. I kept looking over to her, she caught me and smiled. I turned away and had a couple of shots. "Fuck it. I'm going to do this!" I said to myself. I turned back around, she's still there dancing. I walked two steps towards her and then I was pulled to turn around. "You can't do this! She going to hurt you! She a complete bitch! You can do better than her!" All my friends said to me. "Here we found someone for you" they said. This huge disgusting woman appeared. "I think you two are going to get on well" my friends said. "Just because I'm a big guy, I have to be a huge women? Thanks!" I reply. Then little voice could be heard from the huge women. Everyone was confused. Midgets crawled out of the woman folds and said "we've got feelings too you know!". Then scott just started to laugh and started throwing the midgets across the room. After all this commotion, I turned back round and she's still there. Dancing so beautiful. I took a couple of more steps towards her. A very good looking guy appeared next to her. I could see he was a complete arsehole and very arrogant. I could feel the weight on shoulders and the feeling of being pulled away from her but I continue this journey. Now they're having an argument and he hits her. I'm so angry. I took another step forward. She's by herself with bruises on her face. She just standing still. I could hear whispers saying "don't do it!". I took another step. She's back with him. He gets down on one knee and proposes to her. The music stops. She says 'yes'. I turned away and walked out the fire exit door. I'm now on a beach, the weather is bad. It's pouring down with rain. I make my way to some shelter. I took off all my wet cloths and sat down. This arrogant guy is riding his rusted bike across the beach and laughing his head off. "Fucking arsehole" I said to myself.