Acne and Anxiety and my mom said she will stab me 😳

Date: 1/2/2020

I remember taking a shower and for some reason there was a girl sharing the space with me, showering too. She had her back turned to me so I couldn't see her face, but I did see her face later when we were dressed. She was this fictional YouTuber at least in my own reality who was also a writer who wrote articles on psychology. Anyway, in the shower I felt like I was in there for an eternity. At one point, the girl asked me for the soap, which I guess I was hogging. It was awkward. Then, I was squirting shampoo into my hand. Eventually I looked back, still freaked out that there was a stranger showering with me, but she was gone. I felt relieved. I then was getting dressed in what was my dad's house in the dream because my dad and stepmom and my little sister were all in that part. It was awkward. It started with just me and my stepmom. My sister wanted to come in, but I told her to go play in her room. I didn't want her to see me naked. She came in anyways so I had to cover up my genitalia with my hand. Then, my dad was there as I was trying to get my underwear on. It was so awkward as he was paying attention to me and wondering why I was struggling so much as I tried to put on my underwear one-handed, the other hand attempting to cover up my genitalia, but it ended up being a failed attempt. It was just so awkward. Then, my stepmom told me she had made me breakfast downstairs. "Actually, it's my lunch," I corrected her. "I already ate breakfast." I had apparently gotten up earlier than everyone else and eaten. I thought it was like 1 in the afternoon so it was no longer breakfast time anyways, but I found out it was only 10:00 am. Next part: I was in some kinda lecture structured unlike a lecture irl, sitting in some boat with other students. My childhood best friend was there and so was her younger sister who had acne on her face. She doesn't have acne irl, but I do. That's why when she commented on her own acne, jokingly saying, "the struggle of acne," I was like "I feel you." She said it was giving her anxiety and I was like "yeah, I struggle with anxiety too. Even before I got adult acne because I've had anxiety since I was 15." I looked at my childhood best friend when I said this and she was like "I know," although she didn't since we had drifted apart by high school. Her sister started telling me and showing me this topical cream she used. She put it all over the contour of her face, down to her chin. She asked me if I wanted to try it. The scene switched before I could though. Then, I was in this lecture/workshop with this guy and the YouTuber/writer leading it. We were meant to feel privileged because we had access to exclusive content. It was on their website in their articles, but no one else could see them. The people there were psyched to be there. At one point they started asking questions to people, letting them voice their concerns like a therapist would. This guy spoke up about how he's been dealing with stuff, and he usually copes by smoking tea like how you'd smoke marijuana, but it was tea leaves, but he couldn't do that anymore for whatever reason. The leader of the workshop was all like "you're so brave." Then, he was telling us how he didn't appreciate that my ex didn't respect no swearing day. Although, I swear like a sailor and I was unaware of no swearing day, I played along in acting like I knew there was such a day and thinking that was disrespectful. My mom was suddenly there and she and I were watching my ex complete some challenge that was disrespectful to this no swearing day. He had some sort of brown balloon twisted up and it reminded me of fecal matter. We were making fun of him for it. Then, somehow my mom and I got into this fight and she said she'd stab me! I was like "go ahead, stab me in the face!" She was speaking really loud while it was silent and I was whispered to her "be quiet!" But she carried on. Then, I was in this other room with this bunch of these giant pencils. Three stuck out to me, a colorful unsharpened one and two sharpened ones. Then, I could hear audio from the workshop. The guy said "someone might stab someone." And I realized he'd heard my mom. I told her he'd heard her and she didn't seem to care. She was like "you owe me your life," which meant basically she gave birth to me, so she could take my life away. I realized if I reported her, I'd never see her again, which I didn't like. I would have to live with my dad. So, then, I had this packed bag of only clothes and dolls for some reason, and I was at my dad's "house" again.