Realization

Date: 10/2/2016

Tonight I made a decision. I wanted to see Natalie. So I did. I had one of the most introspective experiences of my life. I realized I've been living in a shell. Getting clean is one of the hardest things I've ever done. I have no go to for a release, and so I isolate, headtrip, and self destruct. not now. I realized that life isn't about being succesful, material wealth or education. its about loving each and every person I make contact with. I chose to go to softball: excellent experience: I saw at least 15 people I knew from treatment and beat the Hell out of them. I talked with old friends made new ones and enjoyed myself. Shout out to brook and Brandon. Taking chances are a huge part of everyday life. I choose to take chances to enlighten me as a human. Humanity. That's what this is about. Finding a balance in all areas of life. Yin and yang. I went back to the sports mall and had an incredible time on the roof after stretching for an hour. We talked deep about relationships, societal breakdown, problems with education, and existential value. I was dropped off and proceeded to have a deep conversation with my grandfather for the first time in months. Existentialism, religious disorder, and Viagra. We are all here for this one shot so why not give it all we got. -Stephen yeah I stayed sober -