neighbourhood serial killer

Date: 8/3/2017

i was watching the news on my phone on the way home from school. a newcaster talks about a serial killer in the neighbourhood and that everyone should be on high alert. i met a girl who asked if she could tag along. she had the face of scarlett johansson and a bright pink cosplay wig on, but my dream self didn’t recognise her. i said, "hell yes". suddenly we're on the streets of tokyo and i heard not-scarlett scream. there's a person up ahead and holy shit it's harley quinn. i pushed not-scarlett out of the way and harley sliced me in half through the waist. then for some reason she grabbed my lower half and put them on like they were pants? she ran away wearing my legs. i was somehow still alive, so i rushed home by walking with my arms, DK-style. i assured myself that nothing was wrong and tucked myself into bed... until i heard the laughing. harley was back and wanted my upper half. i'm flattered but i just don't think it'd work out. whatever remained of my dream self managed to scale the fence and i ran into the streets. harley was right outside of my house. she could Smell me and it wasn't my disembodied legs talking. i went to a police station to report what the hell just happened and for some reason there's a tree diagram/map written in japanese outside of it, so i took all the time in the world to read it. the police station is a maze but i manage to find an officer and when they turn around, they're also scarlett johansson. i wake up, relieved to still have my legs.