darkgrey>sickblue

Date: 8/21/2022

it's neither nighttime, nor day. my perpendicular gaze is set upon the dark grey sky above me. and i feel the soft patter of rain drops falling on my heart, but i cannot see them. my bed, big and sick blue, stretches for lightyears to keep me afloat - touching every galaxy and sun, and weaving a comforter of celestial note. i'm not sure how it came to be that i am so far out at sea, but i'm sure that i am alone. i lie. i know. my own curiosity (cat now drowned) brought me here: the desire to touch what is untouchable and to walk into an experience you cannot walk out of. it feels so satisfying on my skin, like coconut oil in winter. it is a strange thing, to look to your hope while sinking into your desire. everyday it grows colder, and i lean into my ire. i must give it something to stay up here; my sanity? perhaps, but did i ever really have it. it is my heart attacked by the sky, so it is my heart i would surrender to the sea. and so i slipped a toe beneath. then gradually followed my body, arms, and hands after my feet. until i am just a face in the cold bed. until i may be declared just almost dead. but i know that i will stay a reflection on the sea, as fixed remains my eye - i'm glad i gave my heart for three. i would probably do it again tonight.