My dog is apparently made out of Nerf !!??

Date: 8/15/2019

I am at an ex-girlfriend's parents house for some type of dinner or something, and I have my dog with me. I don't see him for awhile, and he won't come when I call him, so now I'm walking around looking for him. I finally find him laying on the ground not moving, so I go to pick him up. I notice that he has a big gash down the side of his torso running from his spine to his belly. I gently pick him up and the wound separates... there's no blood whatsoever, and I can see all the muscle and guts and everything. It is horrifying, but much to my surprise, he's still alive and doesn't seem to mind that he's been nearly cut in half. I carry him around the house to where everyone is standing and say, " I gotta go take my dog to the vet!" My ex-girlfriend asks me why and I hold the dog out and pull the gash open (there's no blood at all during this whole ordeal... it's like the dog is made out rubber, or Nerf, or something??). She screams, "Holy shit!! What happened!!" I am just like,... "I have no idea, but I think he's gonna be OK." ...My dog, the whole while, is just as calm and happy as can be...