icky

Date: 11/3/2022

mom was sleeping in a small twin bed that was set up in the room downstairs that’s currently toris. there were a couple beds set up in there like we were living in shelter or hotel. she wasn’t really sleeping she was just laying there thinking. i got up to do something and as soon as she heard i was awake she sat up and said something along the lines of “i think i’m gonna shoot something up”. and this shocked me obviously so i said ‘what?’ almost immediately after the words left her mouth. she was as calm as she could be but she seemed anzy like she is at night a lot. she said to me very calmly “yeah” and pulled out a small handgun from her robe. she was pointing it at me but i was keeping her calm enough to pack a small bag for myself to get out. i knew she was gonna let me go but i didn’t know if she was gonna let me get tori and kimber on my way out too. i felt like if i tried to grab them she would’ve started shooting at us or try to kill us. i was debating if i should leave and go to the police station or call them while i was in the house still. i felt gross and sick to my stomach then the dream changed and i was leaving a motel room of a man who was saying the same things, he was holding a gun and saying he was gonna shoot a bunch of people. i knew that he meant it but i loved him too. he was letting me pack a bag so i could go away from him, but it hurt me to leave him. i was crying while i left but i also felt grateful to get away then the dream skipped and i was following this man (on foot) who was wearing a white button up and black pants. he was making me follow him for some reason. we were outside some businesses at night and he was looking for a way to get into one of them. i was trying to leave while he was distracted but a man appeared from an ally and started drunkenly walking towards him. the guy was so drunk he didn’t even know we were there. the guy with the gun, i think his name was javier, walked straight to the drunk man shit him in the head then walked over to me. he had blood on his face and running down his clothes. he kissed me so intensely that i realized we must be dating or something. then we walked into a costume store to get disguises.