Birthday

Date: 10/15/2021

I was in the mall with my mom, it was my birthday and she said I could pick what we do. I said I wanted to go there because I wanted to maybe see a movie and get lunch. In the back of my head I knew I had no money to spend there. I got there and everyone is jovial and there's a long line. I keep looking around, looking for someone but not understanding who. I get my tickets and I'm having issues because I want my student thing to be put in. Theres a long code now to do it. We get in the hallway and mom keeps saying that I'm going to be so happy later because someone's coming to see me. It's my grandmother, she tells me we're gonna have dinner with her. Sometime in the hallway I see him. He asks me what I'm doing there, I say it's my birthday. He says something else, along the lines of "your birthday, I never see you anymore" Sometime while he's talking he calls me babe off handedly and my dream self is so surprised my chest tightens. Even in my dream it feels like a mistake. He's talking and walking and he's so warm to me. He offhandeldy says to me "I'm such a bad boyfriend" and I am so happy I could explode. I tease him and agree. Afterward I talk to other workers at the theater, he's glancing and staring at me and my friend there asks if I know he is. I tell them, of course I do. I'm fucking obsessed, I can't stop smiling in my dream. He has my name next to a little bed emoji in his phone and I see it. I'm warm and comfortable like a bed? I don't know how to not hear him say those things to me.