The day I saw that I—was holding you back from everything the world had to offer you.

Date: 9/16/2019

It’s when I texted you and expressed my concerns as well as some places where you weren’t lacking what I needed, yet it was like I didn’t know you Bc we met three weeks prior and you never wanted to open up—until I said goodbye. I saw the attachment you and I were growing and it only leaves room for heartbreak and that was something I couldn’t bare. You broke. You told me I was everything and although you have never been in love, you somehow were so sure about me, when I am just another girl. I needed certain things you wouldn’t initiate on your own, and that is the attraction I crave. Overall, you are doing better and it’s so apparent as you cut your hair and you are branching out—even if you walk these girls past my dorm room window to which you lived inside for the first week or so. I just don’t need a shadow or an extra 140 pounds to drag around and tell him exactly what I want and when I want it, when I said I love you, and asked why you haven’t made it official, and saying “I don’t want to date you,” counteracts anything I felt as I’ve always been good at closing myself off. I’m dark and twisted, yet I know my worth and I know what I want: not many people can say that with self confidence. But that’s me, and I’m not in the mood to help you build up yours when I want to thrive.