Mumma being herself.

Date: 4/3/2019

*This is a couple days after of my last EMDR processing. I was walking with my mom with another group of people on some kind of tour group or tourist activity and we were looking at some beautiful scenery outside. My mom I overheard saying “oh I really love vetiver it is so beautiful I have always loved it so much.” I got excited because vetiver is one of those smells that is so natural and green, albeit straw like, and I love it so much. I was glad to connect with my mom. I held back my excitement and walked up to her and said “Mumma, I really love vetiver, it’s one of my favorite things in the whole world.” My mom turned her head to me a little bit and said “Oh, vetiver makes me cough and sneeze like the dickens. I can’t stand to be around it.” I felt sort of deflated and not quite embarrassed but just a little taken aback. I was not surprised though because this is a typical reaction from my mother towards most things or things that I really like and get excited about. I knew that no matter how I handled the situation my mom was just going to be herself so I wasn’t going to try too hard anymore. I decided to let it go.