[mood]

Date: 4/1/2020

Can’t concentrate on anything. Unable to study. Not procrastination but an inability to complete work when I sit down and attempt it. Unable to fall asleep at night lately. Mentally fixate on what I touched during the day that I didn’t wash my hands after and must get out of bed to wash my hands in the middle of the night to get mental rest. After exercising outside today, I blew my nose before entering a corner store (exercise causes mucus) and someone pointed and shouted “SICK” at me, drawing pointless attention. People heard and began avoiding me. This gave me anxiety so I cut my walk short and went home. Now I can’t concentrate enough to do anything except sit in a room or pace a room or look around a room. All I did was blow my nose. Like no one blew their noses before this novel flu. Why would I be jogging with the Coronavirus? Commoners. They wanted me to be sick. They would have loved it. They would have squeezed their little free-with-plan androids out their Lycra-blend denims and started filming with a sick glee in their hearts. Because inside they’re nothing but nasty little school children, smirking while their schoolmates get paddled. That amygdala firing just ever so comfortably. Yes mommy, abandon me a little while I ride this glacier slowly into adulthood. We’ll get there soon. Here we go. We’re a-going.