*trigger warning*

Date: 12/21/2017

I keep dreaming about it. I’d almost wish for a usual symbolic nightmare at this point. It’s a mix of all the worst times. When I cried into pillows or how I clutched my blanket after he was done. The burning hot showers that would always follow. His brown hair and dirty glasses. The hot, breathy, vulgar words he whispered to me as he took what no one should take. It’s just replaying on a loop every time I shut my eyes. It’s like the back of my eyelids are a drive in screen and my head is playing the film on loop. I just want to sleep.