Kenny

Date: 4/28/2018

I was going to start this with recently my dog, Weiser, passed away. But I guess that was in September and a lot of people wouldn’t consider that recent. My brother was extremely extremely sad over his death, so my parents got him a kitten for Christmas. He loves this kitten. A lot. I still have to warm up to it. Every time I see him, I think of the dog. I think of the fact that I didn’t feel like I got enough time to move on before we got another pet. And I think about the day I had to put Weiser down and I didn’t have the strength to go in with my mom so I just cried in the car. I regret that day. I wish I could have gotten a better goodbye. Unfortunately, I kind of take that out on the cat. He’s just a baby, so he scratches really bad and breaks some of our stuff. I know it’s normal kitten things but they really upset me because I’ve wanted a cat my whole life, and I really didn’t want it to come at the cost of my dog. But recently I’ve been processing my feelings for out cat, and it really shone through in my dream this morning. It was strange, and very sudden. My old baby sitter, my neighbour, and I were at the dining room table playing Uno. After she places a card down, my old baby sitter informs me that Kenny died. [Kenny is the cat’s name.] I didn’t believe her at first so I sat quietly for a bit of the game. Later, I asked her if it was true. A great deal after that was just specific thoughts that I can’t seem to remember. After I’d worked some of it out in my head I asked her how he died. She told me he had too much chocolate. I immediately asked if it was mine, because my grandpa just sent me After Eight chocolates for my birthday and I usually have the box accessible in my room. I was really really hoping it wasn’t me that killed him, until she told me it was my brother’s chocolate. And I knew he’d be crying. He would be so extremely upset, especially since he was the one who killed his own kitten. [this is a dream, gentle reminder.] For some reason, I didn’t cry in this dream. I didn’t even feel I had control over my body, I was almost just watching everything unfold. So whereas I was screaming at myself in my head nothing appeared on my face. Moments later, I received a bag from the sky. It was a plastic bag with a teeny tiny grey kitten in it no bigger than half the palm of my hand. With it was a yellow paper that said some word about revival or reincarnation or something, I can’t remember what exactly. They’d told me that Kenny had been sent to space and the shock of the environment change brought him back to life. I asked my old baby sitter if it was true, or at least if she thought it was. She told me it was a thing that was “theorized” or “possible” or something. I opened the bag, worried he would suffocate. But when I had opened it, he was still dead. But now I was staring at his corpse. Then, I woke up. Kenny is sleeping peacefully with my brother, and now that I’ve seen the cat die I think I have more respect for him. I will always miss Weiser, but I now promise not to let that get in the way of this kitten’s safety. Have a good day.