Too real and personal.

Date: 3/18/2020

I was inside my car polishing some rifles. One was a fancy white stock and the other a tactical black finish. It was late and it was raining. Next thing I know I’m inside the house. There’s a Christmas party going on. Everyone is well dressed and jubilant. I’m in my jeans and t-shirt. The place was just uncomfortable. My moms lovers were there as well as my brothers and everyone was just having a good time (but me). Suddenly my brother stands up and he and a stranger put on some fancy ribbon collar things around their necks. They were gonna join the party in the living room to dance. I thought that couldn’t be more gay. I asked my mom to excuse me I’m going back to my car. She said something to upset me such as why do I have to be so weird, different or unsocial. I blew up. Common, your lovers are here looking at me like I’m a fool, my brothers are acting gay over there dancing to Christmas tunes I don’t belong here and I have more than enough reasons to be angry. I went back to my car to continue polishing my rifles and I noticed they were missing. Some one had hidden them and I went back inside to ask who had them. I can’t remember how the ensuing argument went but my point or the emotion felt was that I’m not about to make a stupid mistake and pile more stupid behavior on a family already well stained by stupid behavior. I just want to finish polishing my rifles.

AI generated interpretation Your dream may have several underlying symbolic themes, which could reflect your current emotional or psychological state. The first part of the dream shows you cleaning rifles inside your car during a late and rainy night. This may indicate that you are feeling the need to protect yourself or feel secure in a situation or from potential threats. The different finishes of the rifles could also represent contrasting identities or ways of handling problems - one being more refined or polished, while the other is more practical or utilitarian. The second part of the dream takes place inside the house during a Christmas party. You feel out of place and uncomfortable being underdressed and witnessing your mom's lovers and brothers act "gay". The party and dancing may represent social norms or cultural expectations that make you uneasy and may feel forced or inauthentic. The ribbons around the necks of your brother and a stranger could symbolize a sense of conformity that you reject or feel disdain towards. Your explosive reaction towards your mother's comment about your behavior being weird or unsocial emphasizes your feeling of being misunderstood or judged by others, particularly your family. The rifles hold great significance, as they represent your individuality and sense of control, hence why they are the focus of your dream. The fact that they were missing and that someone had hidden them suggests that you feel that someone is trying to control or take away your power or identity. Overall, your dream suggests that you may be struggling with feelings of isolation, frustration and a need for control. You are not willing to conform to expectations or behave in a way that does not align with your values and beliefs. Consider focusing on the things that make you feel secure and in control, as well as finding ways to assert your individuality without feeling isolated or rejected by those around you.