A Killer Joke

Date: 6/18/2017

By HahaHyena

I was walking down the hallway talking with a girl named Kailyn, who happens to be the girlfriend of a very popular kid at my high school. We were walking to lunch talking and it was one of the last days of school. We stopped by the vending machines. Normally this is the point where she goes over to a table to sit with her boyfriend and some other popular kids, and I go elsewhere to sit. But this time, out of the blue, I kissed her hard on the lips. She was shocked, and rightfully so. I went to sit, knowing full well that I would have to pay for what I did in the coming minutes. She went over to her table and I could hear her relaying the events. After she did, she said "he wasn't half bad, either", which made me chuckle, and marked the point at which her boyfriend got up and came over to me. When he got to me, I, the 5'7" scrawny kid, stood up ready to fight the 6'4" behemoth, and he punched me square in the jaw. When he did, I quietly giggled. He heard me and punched me again, this time straight to the nose. With blood dripping down my face, I began to laugh harder. He kept punching me, and I kept laughing uncontrollably and laughed louder with each blow. Eventually, he stopped looking visibly distressed and yelled "Why won't you stop laughing?!", to which I responded, "Because I'm insane!", and I proceeded to punch him once in the face, knocking him out cold. I walked over to his table and sat down next to Kailyn. She looked at me awestruck and I said "what's wrong, babe? You look like you've seen a ghost," and I put my arm around her. She didn't resist, and I began to make out with her. When her boyfriend got up, she whispered, "slap him." So I got up and walked over to him. As I walked to him I said, "you know, this reminds me of a joke--" and then backhanded him across the face and put him back on the ground. For the rest of high school, I was the most popular kid in school, and did whatever I wanted, because the teachers and staff were scared of me. I cut class, made out with Kailyn during school, and passed all my classes with straight A's because they were afraid of what I might do if they failed me. I was a psychopath and and my girlfriend just ate it up. She posted on her Instagram, "He's 5'7", insane, and I love him." We were inseparable. She was the Harley Quinn to my Joker. I even started to call her Harley. She loved it.