Happiness

Date: 7/18/2018

I don’t remember how long ago this dream was but I know it was within my sophomore year. At first it was based around my first love that I had in the 9th grade. We’re gonna call him Adonis. Well it was me and Adonis in my house alone and we were kinda adults. I’m “in love” with him but I’m scared of him at the same time. I feel kinda trapped in the house. Anyways he’s getting ready to leave and I don’t want him to because I wanted him to spend time with me but I was too shy to ask so I let him leave. Next the dream takes me to the top of this building (it looks like I’m in California) and it was just beautiful and sunny outside. One of the buildings across from me had a huge painting of childish gambino’s “because the internet” cover all over the side. Which is amazing because I’m madly in love with that album😂. In my head I’m thinking *I ought to go back to house before Adonis gets back* but before I walked back down the building I see my best friend and her little brother on the roof too. I go over to them excited to see them and we all walk to another part of the roof where there are about 6-8 other teens there having the best time of their lives. I end up making friends with all of them. We talk about live and try to distinguish the paintings that were on the walls of these buildings and wondering what they mean. There’s this one old man with a guitar sitting on the edge of the building and me, my best friends, and the new people sit around him and listen to him strum a song. He starts to sing some lyrics then insists that I do too. So as he’s playing me and my best friends are making up lyrics as we go. The song sounded really nice from what I remember. I was having so much fun being young hanging out with other people my age and living life that I completely forgot about Adonis and didn’t give a fuck if he was mad that I’m gone. I was really happy. At the beginning of the dream I was grown and gloomy and my only source of any type of joy was a man who didn’t really care. It ended with me in the sunshine as a teenager with my friends being happy and laughing like I always should’ve been. The fact that “Adonis” was a real life ex who broke my heart made this dream feel very real