The Magic of Being Alone

Date: 7/15/2019

We were on a train. One of us wasn't, he was on the ground safe in his home. There were three of us and we planned and planned. We were planning a magic spell. But the very last bit wasn't coming together. We each had a designated role, I was female and took the feminine, the boy took the masculine but our practice was lackluster. We had an argument the day of casting and it was called off sorta. At the last minute, already into the hour of the spell, we made up and decided to try. Suddenly he took up the mantle of 'Ariel' and I took up the masculine. Our man on the ground, a boy for all were all school age, was perfect in his part. It really wasn't much of a spell, just a simple evocation, a glimpse of the divine. We all cast each from our prospective positions and the air in front of us lit up in a neon blue rectangle sign in front of us. The boy on the ground saw it best as it was dark and he was outside in the garden. And I was in his perspective when he saw her. The spell finished and she came to us to each of us. In the black garden with only a distant moon to barely light it a female crone hag nimbly climbed the fence. It was scary how flexible and quick she was, this shadow visage of her. But I saw her in the light, definitely the Witch Mother, the Crone Hag. She wore period clothes and had the stereotypical face you see of witches. I think she was something like the spirit of Halloween but far far more important than mere Halloween or even Samhain. She didn't stsy long, just a jaunt across the yard right in front of me which only took a few seconds. I was afraid she could kill me quite easily if she had the mind to but she didn't and the awe won over the fear. I managed to squeak out a "Thank you" through my closed throat. She turn back her head over her shoulder, wicked hooked nose with it, and smiled. "Be good," she said as she hobbled off into the other yard. "But not too good!" she added with a beautiful cackled laugh. I can't describe the feelings of that advice which caught in me. Her voice was so warm and liquid like the dark night all around. And the personal care in them made me feel singular in all the world. I think I impressed her by speaking up. I think most people didn't say anything and she gave me the gift of those words in exchange. I was thrilled. ~ I was home, living in my family's farm house out in the middle of nowhere once again. Their loving stifleing bosom made me long to escape, I was a bit overwrought by their micromanaging. But one day they all left, went on a trip and got stuck inside a large luggage compartment, like a walk in beneath a building. They were trapped and no one knew they were there or that they needed rescue. I was sad. I assumed they were gone on vacation. I hadn't liked the hustle and bustle but as time wore on I began to feel the strain of being alone. When they were all there, bossing me about, I couldn't stand their company. But alone in that house without them I grew more and more desolate. Maybe it was the fact it was their house subject to their rules. In the city I lived alone and never felt this loneliness. I cleaned the house and took care with what I ate or used and I contemplated I didn't want to date ever. But I questioned myself on that too, as I pushed the cuticles of my nails back whole I stood in the kitchen. If a girl came to the door, interested, and asked me out would I really not want to date her? My nails were odd today, instead of five little nail beds I just had one huge one and I could push all the cuticles back all at once, like a giant line. I would want to date her, I admitted. That was when I knew I was lonely. My grandmother came home, her and a few others. I felt better and didn't feel better at all. They were all sick and didn't come out their room. They were sick because of the banana milk I kept in the fridge. It made me sick too but I kept drinking it. They couldn't even come out because it was in the house but I could drink it and get it gone. Three family members, my favorite people, were in the locker still, trapped and barely functioning on so little food as travel snacks. I tried cleaning again, so they wouldn't see I had made a mess. They could be home any minute now and I had a guilty conscience. ~ I'm working for an Asian woman while I also do a few things online. I'm her nanny and I even start a recipe channel online in which we make cute snacks and stuff for children. Her kids, a boy and a girl, help. I worry about putting them on the internet. I wouldn't want their privacy intruded upon. One day in the garage I run into a neighbor and recommend the Asian lady to help them. At night I'm wandering. I missing three people very badly. I want them back with all my heart. I'm limping, my toe is gone and I've a leash around the legiments sticking out. But a tiny pig is following me everywhere and any passing car thinks I'm taking my dog for a walk. I try and hood the leash to the pigs harness while still staying stuck to the legiments but they are too large and swuishy so I give up.