Date: 4/9/2017
By hansbellmer
Rhys and people like that are trying to set me up with a girl. I am reluctant to make a commitment to some kind of date, I say “I’ll meet up with her in a social situation”. The setting feels like my primary school playground, just outside the forest at the bottom of the hill. “Ugh”, they say, rolling their eyes, they know I don’t want to do it. But I agree to, half just so I don’t confirm their expectation that I’m a coward or don’t care about girls or whatever. I start to stalk her on Facebook, her profile name is something like “Anna Kofordmother”. Her real name is Anna Koford, she’s added the “mother” part because she has a young kid. I’m a bit put off by this, I never really imagined getting together with someone who already has a kid. She’s about 30, long dark hair and a wide smile, a relaxed pose, she looks like a very free spirit. I look around further and find her blog. She talks about her dreams there, which I find very attractive. She’s also done an illustration of herself having sex with a spider. She is lying on her back, her limbs curling upwards, and the enormous spider on top of her has all its legs and fangs curling downwards. They have fused themselves together like a strange open lattice shape. We finally organise to meet. Somehow we end up in a room, she will be sleeping up on a bunk bed and me on a mattress below. At first there is an air of resignation, like the start of the dream, again nothing will happen. But we start talking, and soon it has gone too far. There is only us in the room, I’m standing up at her bunk, our faces not far apart. She is missing some teeth I notice. But something makes me get over all this. She is so comfortable, so uninhibited. Then I am sitting up on the bunk and she casually starts running one finger down the back of my jeans. I start to do the same to her. I’m ready to take this on, I think, it feels natural. Later I’m in the backyard at my family home. The neighbor’s pig has escaped into our yard and has secretly had a litter of piglets. A whole lot of our chickens have formed a circle around it, keeping each other warm in the frosty yard. Underneath all this is a pile of little piglets.