what have you learned?

Date: 5/31/2016

I'm part of a group of dancers. We are rehearsing 2 dances. One is a saguaro dance(supposedly). We dance in a line and alternately raise our arms. I feel that it is kind of dumb and I'm not very good at it. I feel like the other dancers don't really want me in their group anyway. I also don't have the appropriate dress somehow. There is a girl in the group that I like. However it is alluded that something is wrong with her. She is gone. I find out that when she was younger, she dated her own dad. The brother knew about it too. I confront another of the girls and ask her if this is true; she says it is. She acts like it's not a big deal, it was a long time ago. I leave the dance practice, although I know I'll probabLy be kicked out of the group. I walk to a big room that seems to be the lunch room (I guess I'm in a school). The current boyfriend is there. He is sort of gangster/rapper like. He's stoned and he's playing a hand held video game. I go over to him and try to be sweet but he mostly ignores me. I keep trying and he pushes me off. I leave. I go outside thinking, "oh I'm being too needy. I need to go away from him for awhile." Then I think, no that's stupid. He's stupid. I'm not playing those relationship games. I'd rather just be single. I start to do a little dance on the grass. I walk / dance away, outside.