Rage dream

Date: 2/24/2019

I’m going to a park junior high basket ball game with my brothers, Sam and Leo. I park the van in the parking lot on a sunny, spring/summer day. In the gym I throw something in the trash and then we decide to sit at the top of the bleachers in the middle, me sitting one row above my brothers. I then give up my seat for a man and move closer to my brothers. There is a man below us, maybe 3 rows down, yelling some things that I assume are about me and my brothers. He is not ever facing me directly. He is a white man and I thing he was wearing a dark blue, generic baseball hat. I stand up and start screaming. It gets heated, and I say that I will kill him multiple times. I threaten to set him on fire. Me and my brothers leave, but I run ahead out of the main door of the gym into a dark blue hallway with glass exit doors ahead of me. I go left and then turn left again down another hallway and grab a roll of toilet paper, intending to set it on fire and throw it into the gym while we leave with a lighter in my pocket. I decide this is a bad idea. Leo and Sam and I walk out the doors and they walk way ahead of me. We are looking for the car which is to our left but we went right. We then turn back the right way, and Leo reminds me to turn the giant inflatable animal on on the top of the van. I can’t remember what it was. We get home, I am talking to my mom at the kitchen table about the incident. It is still day time, the light at the table is off but the one at the island is. I explain that we got kicked out. She is not happy. I said that I said some bad things, that I threatened to kill a man and set him on fire. She is furious. All of the sudden I am no longer sitting where mom normally sits, and she is no longer two seats to my right. She is in her normal seat and I am to her left. She says she is angry that I am capable of that much violence. I grab a ceramic mug and chuck it with my left hand into the living room and I hit the back right corner. It shatters. I say that I can control this violence but if she is angry, she is just angry at who I am and that makes me angrier