Just a Kiss

Date: 12/7/2019

So I had a dream about going on a date with a guy I’ve liked for a few months since our professor grouped us together in English class. We’ll call him Jake. In the dream Jake and I are supposed to be hanging out. Well for whatever reason my mom is in the hospital and as a ploy to hang out longer I was going to ask him to come with us. Well my parents come back just as he goes to say no, but they encourage us to go with them somewhere. It was almost like an IKEA type store, but a restaurant. Very blurry. Irregardless he could tell something was off and we had a lengthy discussion and argument about him not wanting to break my heart and about me not wanting my heart broken. I went on a rant about how I’ve hurt myself (TW: Self Harm) before and nobody else could ever hurt me that bad. Well we go to a movie and he puts his arm around me and it made my heart flutter. We eventually end up back at my house and he almost leaves without saying much but he realizes he’s missing this mechanical thing that kinda looks like a vape. Well he can’t find it and we agree on date number two. Well we hug and he kissed my forehead and I kiss his cheek. As he goes to leave out of muscle memory he tells my family (not just me) “I love you”. Like you could see him get embarrassed too. But then the dream ended and J woke up. I was very much so there physically my entire dream. A small part of me was aware it was a dream but I never addressed it. But I could feel people touching me, eyes had life, I could physically feel myself pacing during our argument/discussion. I could even feel my stomach drop and my heart flutter. What does this mean?