"Yo, Beyoncé! What are you doing under a cabin bed?!"

Date: 5/27/2017

I realised there was a hole in the wall of my living room. I'd often shoo away cats that had managed to get into the house through it. The hole looked out onto my secret garden. I heard a noise and was surprised to see a little girl's face glaring back at me. "Are you lost?" I asked. She nodded. "Walk over to the other side of garden!" I told her. I met her under this bridge and she said that her mum was on her way. I gave her a cuddle because she seemed upset. My mum appeared and asked me why I had a random child with me and I explained what had happened. We then discovered a secret cupboard that I had never opened before. "Do you know what's in here?" My mum asked. "I've never opened it!" I said. She yanked it open to reveal a room full of random stuff. To be honest, I was just expecting spiders, so I stood well back. Inside, there were pretty stringed lights along with boxes and boxes of tacky hen night memorabilia. My mum kept handing me stuff and saying it would come in handy. She's such a hoarder - can never throw anything away! "These cards would come in handy!" She said. I agreed, and suddenly a song began to play on this old record player. My mum and I began to argue about what the song was called, and I remember Googling the lyrics. We then went back to check on the girl, but she had gone. We assumed she had found her mother again. I felt sad that she had fled so quickly, but then I saw that she'd left her scooter behind - a Paw Patrol one. "Oooo, Alex would like this!" I beamed. A while later, we were riding around on our scooters. Having races through the cobbled streets of what looked like Italy. It was so much fun. Next scene; I was having this house party and things were getting out of hand. I desperately wanted everyone to leave, so I could start tidying up. I pretended to be drunk and threw up in the sink. "Are you alright, Amanda?" One of Mat's old workmates asked. "I'm not feeling good at all!" I lied. When they all left, I lit up a celebratory cigarette and felt relief. Next scene; I was in Woolworths. (Old skool, I know) and for some reason, I had this oil in my mouth and my cheeks were bursting. I kept my head down and tried not to make eye contact with people - I didn't want them to see me in this way and I had no where to spit out the oil. I saw my friend Liz, she was with a group of work colleagues and I quickly hid. I certainly didn't want to see her. Next scene; I was watching Beyoncés new music video. She was hiding under a cabin bed and her lips kept Inflating - getting bigger and bigger. At one point, I thought they were going to take over her entire face. It was all a bit bizarre!