texting my fucking rude ass hamster

Date: 2/13/2019

By squidward

i was in this groupchat with my friend and my hamster. evan and i were talking and whatever, and then my hamster comes into the group with full caps and deteriorating letters being cryptic as fuck. i said “you good?” and he replied with “NO.” and i left him on read. i told evan i had to go and put my phone down. when i put my phone down, my hamster started talking to me from across the room in this disgusting tone telling me to come to his cage right away for treats. i refused.