The One With Paley’s Excel Confessions

Date: 7/21/2024

I open an Excel document and realize that I’ve somehow accessed a log Paley is keeping of all the things she’s been up to. She’s written entries about “buying black panties” and “getting blackout drunk.” I feel a sudden responsibility to do something about it, but first go to tell Brianna and Peyton what’s going on. I find them on a staircase with Paley and wonder how I’m going to show them without her finding out … I’m in a weird net under a boat with Brody’s family. They’ve apparently brought me here to help me overcome my fear of the ocean. I’m already a little anxious when I see a great white swimming up. I’m immediately terrified and start climbing out of the net. Brody asks where I’m going and I just respond with, “I’m out of here.” I wonder how they can all be so calm … I’m walking through a very crowded store with Renee talking about the Aunt Marni situation when we accidentally bump into her. We pretend not to notice her, and she does the same with us. We see that Aunt Marcia is close behind and ignore her as well … I’m walking around what feels like a hotel with my mom when we bump into Holly and a woman who looks a lot like her but taller and thicker. When we walk away, my mom explains that this woman was an old girlfriend of Phillip’s. I say, “Holy crap, he really has a type!” She then explains that this woman tried to hook up with Phillip after his divorce with Holly, but that Phillip is apparently trying to get Holly back. I wonder if Holly and the woman became friends because they both had bad experiences with the same man.