Bicycle Shame, A Drunken Midget and a Lucid Snog! 👄

Date: 8/28/2019

By amandalyle

I was at work and had to do a meds check for one of my service users, but realised that he had been neglected since I had had a week off work and he had gone batshit crazy and was acting really strange and out of character. Then he tried to attack me and I ran out as fast as I could. Next scene; I was supposed to be meeting my friend in town. She wanted to pop into Primark and then go for drinks afterwards. I climbed into what I though was my car but turned into a horse and cart (which was really hard to drive!) and which then turned into a tiny pink kids bike with stablizers. As I was peddling My too-big clumsy legs frantically, I suddenly felt really ashamed and could hear people laughing as I passed them by. Finally, I met my friend and ditched the bike as quickly as I could (down some back alley) and we went into Primark. Next Scene; there was a party at mine which had gotten really rowdy and out of hand. Half the people who had taken residence in my home, I had never even met before. As I walked outside, I saw a midget leaping off of the roof of my house and jumping into my neighbours garden. “Oh fuck!” I thought “they already despise me!”. I checked the neighbours windows to see if were in, praying that they weren’t home, but I could see them peering out of the window at the frightening sight that was a drunken dancing midget wrecking their garden. “I’m sorry!” I cried. “I don’t know him!” I walked back into my house (and, at this point, I felt myself become lucid) I spotted my hot neighbour from down the road (not the killjoy bastards from next door) and told him I wanted to kiss him. We then had a massive passionate kiss (with a wee bit of tongue) and it felt so real and awesome ... it made me slightly wet 💦 ... and then... before I could rip his clothes off... I woke up. Curse you, overly excited mind!?