The One Where Timothée Wants the Tea

Date: 8/8/2025

Jess and Candi are at my house right before the babies’ naptime. I’m trying to get Elliott to follow me into his room, but Jess says, “Let’s get your sandals on!” Ignoring this, I tell Elliott that it’s time to take a nap. He starts melting down, so I pick him up and carry him toward his room. On my way, I see Candi outside, cleaning out the inside of a large vehicle … I’m in a house I don’t recognize with a big group of Candi’s side of the family as they go through old pictures. Someone asks me if I know where a picture of Elaine in a living room is, to which I reply that I don’t. Everyone gathers in the dining room and Candi opens up a book of peoples’ Christmas cards to show me. At some point, Candi is replaced by Kristen Jankowski, who points at a picture of a clearly Hispanic man with gray hair and a black mustache and says something about being able to imagine him with black hair. I somehow take this as a racist thing to say and reply sarcastically, “Yep, you can imagine anyone with black hair.” I head into the kitchen where I find my dad and Timothée Chalamet, who is holding a pair of Elliott’s pajamas. He smiles at me knowingly and says, “Nothing?” I realize that he knows how crazy my in-laws all make me and sigh. I smile and say, “I’m trying to be good!”