Well If You Don't Want Me, I May As Well Climb In The Toilet

Date: 4/6/2017

I'm at the Ibiza Weekender hotel from the ITV programme. I ask the rep Hayley on a date and she says yes. I feel excited. Later, I am in the toilet and Daphne from Frasier walks in to let me know that Hayley has decided not to attend our date. Daphne is quite sympathetic and invites me to sit with her, Frasier, Martin and Niles but I decline. I stand up from the toilet I'm sat on and, in a state of sad rejection, slowly climb into the toilet feet first until I'm shoulder deep in the bowl.